One of the biggest misconceptions in the world of personal development is regarding doing what we like to do. We are told that to be successful one should do what he or she loves and many take that statement and interpret it as “I should enjoy whatever I do all the time or else I am not doing the right thing” which is a false interpretation of the aforementioned recommendation.
If the end goal is to do what you like doing then the means to that end is to what you don’t like at all! This statement seems overly simple on the surface but in fact it is one of the hardest notions to truly fathom and internalize on an emotional level. Think of one thing that you really like doing, it could be absolutely anything be it traveling, sleeping over on the weekend, watching your favorite movies, getting a good massage, or eating your favorite meal. Even such highly enjoyable activities will inevitably involve doing things that you don’t like doing. For instance, to travel which is something that you do enjoy you have to do things like booking, planning, packing your bags, going through the boring process of obtaining a visa if the country you are traveling to requires one, waiting in long lines, putting up with delayed or long flights, occasionally get lost in a city or lose an item or document, and many such things that you don’t like but without them you will never get to enjoy the wonders of traveling.
A similar approach can be used to describe all other aforementioned examples and if we take a look at more worthy ideals from graduation and making a business profitable to having the body of your dream or a satisfactory relationship you will inevitably have to do many things that you don’t like in order to finally get to do what you do like and often you have to do the things that you don’t like first, do them more often, and keep doing them for as long as you pursue your goals.
It is naive to assume that once you discover a goal or a profession that you love then you can enjoy every minute of every day in its pursuit. This naïveté not only wrongfully makes the natural process of goal attaining, which inevitably involves doing things that you don’t like, seem out of place but also could send people on a wild goose chase of constantly looking for another goal or profession that they enjoy doing all the time without ever finding it.
Yes, you must set goals and find professions that you absolutely love and yes it is crucial for the work to be cognitively meaningful and emotionally fulfilling for you; however, you cannot and should not expect to enjoy everything you do on the way to accomplishing them. Steve Jobs is perhaps the most renowned figure when it comes to this issue as he not only did what he loved at Pixar and Apple but also recommended everyone to do the same. He once said: “ Your work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do”.
His love for what he did not only enriched Steve’s life but also put a “major dent in the universe” as he had wished all along. Yet a quick glance at his magnificent life reminds us that on the way to realizing his mission and as part of the very work that he loved to do Steve Jobs underwent many trials and dire situations that he did not like at all, just imagine being ousted out of the company that you have created yourself, going through many legal battles, constantly having the media criticize and judge your every move, not to mention the other issues that would have made focusing on his work difficult such as serious family issues and even cancer.
Once we understand that doing what we like doing requires us to spend a great deal of time doing the things that we do NOT like, sometimes for years, we avoid the trap of confusing doing what we love with doing what we enjoy all the time since while the former is the worthiest of all aims the latter is but an illusion. In order to do what you like, you have to also do what you don’t like and once you internalize this lesson not only will you be more resilient in face of the inevitable obstacles ahead but can also get to doing what you really like much faster!
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Daniel Molgan Official 